Are Your Children More Likely to Divorce If You Divorce?

Quite often, parents form the opinion that if they have divorced, it is highly likely that their children will follow them and get divorced in the future. This causes serious concern among parents in the US, most of them strongly believing that their actions will invariably push their children towards divorce as well.

While this appears true as you are making divorce, the solution to get rid of your unhappy marriage, research offers somewhat varied inputs. It refers to the relationship between parental divorce and the probability of divorce in children as intergenerational transmission. There’s no hard rule that your divorce would eventually result in your children following the same pattern.

Research certainly indicates an elevated risk of divorce, however, there are various other factors that come in. Socio-economic elements, income, education, and age at marriage are just some of the parameters to consider. That said, when so many aspects influence divorce, it cannot be stated that parents being divorced will necessarily lead to divorce in children.

Read on to delve into the various findings from research and the ways to deal with your children in case you are divorced so that they are emotionally stable. You can even seek the guidance of a Portland divorce lawyer in this regard.

Understanding The Slightly Elevated Risk As Mentioned In The Research
Children of divorced parents are often succumbed to stress, both emotional and psychological, conflicts between parents, the financial burden in some cases, and others. Quite often, they lose trust in relationships, suffer a loss in education, and may lack financial stability. The factors of emotional and psychological stress play a significant role in impacting the mindset of the children. These aspects may adversely impact their life and attitudes.

In addition, environmental and certain genetic traits also impact their childhood and lead to intergenerational divorce. Social, cultural, and personal factors may also impact their outlook and perspective.

However, there’s the other side as well. Many children also learn the struggles of marriage from their parents and plan their life accordingly. They prepare themselves for the challenges and adopt a realistic mindset. Such children truly understand the essence of marriage and more importantly, believe in mutual adjustment, sacrifice, and other values of life.

That said, it is not appropriate to arrive at generalized conclusions cementing the belief that if you are divorced, your children will follow a similar approach. Talk to your family lawyer or seek the guidance of a Portland divorce lawyer to understand how children of divorced parents are impacted as they may have seen many cases.

Ways To Deal With The Issue Of Intergenerational Divorce
Studies indicate that children of divorced parents suffer as they undergo a lot of stress, emotional loss in relationships, and more. However, you can talk to your partner or spouse and make your children’s life better by considering it as a common objective.

So, what are the key aspects you need to focus on for the welfare of your children? It makes sense to go for legal counseling to understand how children of divorced parents feel. Seek the help of a Portland divorce lawyer to help you out.

Strong Relationship Skills
Your children require to be strong and develop faith in relationships. They need to gain empathy, emotional understanding, problem-solving, excellent communication ability, and conflict-management skills.

Positive Relationship Role Models
Keep your children in close touch with your best friends, and other family members, and expose them to community programs so that they develop positive relationship values and ideals.

Make your children resilient and develop a positive mindset
Teach your children ways to effectively manage stress, inculcate positivity and have faith in life and relationships.

Co-operative and Supportive Co-parents
If you and your ex-partner decide to co-parent for the sake of your children, try attending such classes to perform your role to the best. Counseling from a Portland divorce lawyer may also help you understand the legal side and deal with the situation better.

Help your children understand divorce
Talk to your children about you and your partner getting divorced, while not blaming him/her. Explain the importance of commitment, mutual understanding, and sharing values. Make them understand the situation that triggered you and your ex-partner to take this step in an unbiased manner, without feeling any shame or stigma.

Make your children stable
Besides emotional stability, it’s necessary that your children have access to financial resources, good education, affordable shelter, and other basic amenities that make their life comfortable and carefree.

In addition, as parents, it is your responsibility to ensure your children are mentally and emotionally strong. If required, take them to a psychologist or counselor for therapy sessions.

In case, your children are teenagers, it makes sense to encourage them for pre-marital counseling. As per John Gottman, pre-marital counseling plays a significant role in making couples understand the importance of marriage, be realistic about their relationship, and help them manage life more efficiently.


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